For someone who is unaccustomed to this style of “treat” the shouting and play-fighting could be intimidating the first time around. Not knowing whether to sit and watch, to look the other way, to let out a sigh of despair or an awkward laugh. And, when is it appropriate to sit back and let someone else pay, when to offer to pay the bill yourself or split the bill amongst the group?

My rule of thumb  has always been — expect the unexpected.

While Chinese may put on a show to save face, Japanese, Koreans may not. Japanese usually opt to split the bill with you, and may become embarrassed if you choose to pay the bill (speaking from personal experience). Koreans treat you if they consider you a guest, which is pretty much all the time. Young Koreans may not offer at all if you’re much older in years than them. Even Southeast Asians carry out acts of kindness beyond their financial means to honour a guest. When it comes to Buddhist monks, expect them not to offer anything other than a prayer. Here it is an honour for you to pay for them as most monks lack finances. So, if you are on a tight budget be careful when offering to take a monk out for lunch — and this can happen.

On western shores particularly in English speaking countries, I’ve found that people tend to have similar ways of going about paying for the bill. There are those who like to perform and there are those who slink off to the cash register to pay, or discreetly hand over the money to the wait staff at an opportune time.

When it comes to business dinners, well there are etiquette books to help anyone in need.

Some lingo differences to consider:

In the US  it’s “my treat”, in the UK and UK English speaking countries it’s “my shout” or I’ll shout (not literally).

“I’ll get this” means — “I’m picking up the check”.

“Tab” or “check” means bill in the US. Bill means check (tab) in UK English speaking countries

Back to the Chinese ritual. If you have the privilege of being invited to dinner with Chinese (no matter where they reside and from which country), you are considered a guest someone special, and a fuss will be made of you.

by Cate

Caffeinated Traveller

And then, something happens.

Your head begins to swirl, your eyes start to glaze and you can feel an unfamiliar tightening in the chest. Frightened you stand like a statue, your feet cast in concrete. People are buzzing around you, their faces look similar: dark hair, dark eyes, faces round and alert. They swiftly move past, speaking words you don’t hear. This is not how you imaged it would be, ever. Resigned you retreat back into the hotel in need of a seat and solitude. This is, along with your new destination, your first time in such a crowd.

Welcome to Asia.

by Cate

It’s been a year since I last stepped foot on Asian soil. Yes I miss the place, the countries, the cultures but not the crowds. These I’ve said my farewells, I’ll revisit them from time to time but that’s all.

Crowds are not an Asian phenomenon they occur everywhere, but the difference is crowd behaviour: the movement within the group, the flow, the pace and the sheer numbers. These factors have managed to overwhelm even the most desensitized people including myself.

But I’ve learnt one crucial thing about crowd control — patience.

Golden rule 1: work the Tao!

Unless you are absurdly stupid, don’t force your way through a dense crowd. Become one with crowd, think Tao and go with the flow. Personally I’ve found Asians good at working large-scale crowds, they’re aware and accepting, never pushy or angry.

Sometimes though the only way around a crowd is through it and this is when you can become a virtual icebreaker. Be gentle but strong, never look into peoples faces because you end up walking into them and they you. This doesn’t mean you push, oh no, like an icebreaker you should part.

Golden rule 2: know when to hold and when to fold

Like many Westerners I was brought up on guilt and the notion that if you don’t know how to react — be polite. My first experience in Asia taught me a lot about the downfalls of being polite. I stood back so others could pass, I never walked side by side on a busy sidewalk, nor did I cut in front of another person.

Again like Westerners who did this, I felt good about being polite but quickly realised I was getting nowhere fast.

Know when to use the polite card and your actions will be rewarded, but also know when to fold the manners away for safe keeping. There are differing levels of politeness, just because you stand back for others doesn’t mean you’re a winner. You could end up spending the entire day doing this.

by Cate

Golden rule 3: it’s about timing

Find the hours in the day, the days in the week, the weeks in the month and months in the year when crowds are small or non-existent. Then make your move. Beaches aren’t packed all the time, shops become busier during sales and on weekends, and lunch hours in business districts pack out eateries. Bars bustle from Thursday to Saturday but slow down on Sunday.

It’s about timing, ask the reception staff in hotels, or expats living around the area. Asia is not loud and busy all the time.

by Cate

Golden rule 4: plan well

You simply can’t avoid those happy holiday-makers who create their own crowds within a crowd. Theme parks, cinemas, shopping centres, galleries, museums and historic attractions are packed during the middle of the day but empty out near closing time. Know what attractions will likely be busy, then make a plan.

By Cate

Of course you could spent the entire trip on a beach in the middle of winter, during a storm, far away from anyone and anything. Less maddening perhaps but that depends on how you define maddening.

Caffeinated Traveller

Modern streetcars are quiet and roomy, but it’s the old wooden cars, those grand old dames from way back when, that are also magnets to tourists. It’s easy to see why. The thrill of sightseeing in something novel, something old, something that befits a place in time.

by Cate

Double decker or single deck, old streetcars share a commonality — narrow at the girth. I have to admit, when I saw the streetcars clattering through Hong Kong, cornering at above streetcar speeds, I cringed while waiting for the moment when a corner speed was misjudged and a car wobbled over on to its side. But one never did.

In San Francisco, streetcars rule the inner city around the, waterfront, downtown, harbourside and historic rail routes.  These cars are subtly placed at the top of the city’s vehicular pecking order. Tracks interlace the roads, signals dictate to pedestrians and motorised traffic moves in separate lanes. Depending on the time of day the cars are literally crammed with people liked sardines in a can. But other times these cars run on empty, a kind of quiet empty which gives you plenty of time to soak up the interior with a camera — in between the jerking and the, all too often, rapid braking.

by Cate

Possibly the best way to ride in comfort is to park yourself on one of the not so plush benches and soak up the trip.

by Cate

San Francisco’s streetcars have been wonderfully preserved by Streetcar.org a non-profit group that has worked on the upkeep of the cars and the history behind the city’s streetcars.  As for the other cities out there on this planet? I cannot tell you whether municipal governments maintain their own streetcars or whether private organisations do it themselves.

by Joe May

But one thing is certain. Take a ride on one of these beauties, the old historic grand ladies I mean. The smell of polished wood, the ring of bell that resonants with a musical quality no longer common, and enjoy a first class lesson in history.

by Joe May

Caffeinated Traveller

My time in Hong Kong was brief–two days– which was to involve, with some careful planning, a lot of wandering and discovering. Time to spend exploring the dizzy heights of Hong Kong island, the markets on Kowloon, and possibly a side trip to Macau. My plan failed within one hour because on my first day in Hong Kong, it rained.

On this small, densely populated island hub, rain doesn’t mix well with narrow streets and busy lunchtimes. Nor does rain mix well with discovering a place on foot. Sometimes in situations like these, it is better to discard the plan and move onto something spontaneous. This was a chance to find out what lay around Hong Kong’s corner.

by Cate

Lantau island’s sleepy Miu Wo village. Twenty minutes by ferry from Hong Kong, literally just around the corner. An island of tranquil coves, golden sands, forested parks, and national treasures. Lantau island offers good trekking, peaceful surroundings to mediate, and local history. In Miu Wo village, peace and quiet has little to do with its location and everything to do with transport; where boats and bikes take preference over cars.

by Cate

And sustainable fishing is an integral part of the village’s life and culture.

by Cate

Stepping foot on Lantau island and finding it not only sunny but stress free, was worth going that extra distance to see what lay beyond Hong Kong. Miu Wo village has to be one of the island’s best kept secrets. Where locals go about their daily lives playing mahjong, idly chatting over fishing nets, or sitting on the sun-warmed beach, away from the school groups, blissfully flying kites.

by Cate

Getting to Lantau island is easy. Take one of the ferries from Hong Kong island main ferry terminal. Ferries depart frequently, usually twice an hour. It costs around $25 HK one way. There is also a direct ferry service to Miu Wo village (best keep that one a secret).

Caffeinated Traveller

Narrow streets and lanes wind their way around the island’s hills, where hundreds of steps all purposely built, join and counter join these feeder roads and streets. Roads that seem as though they were carefully built to link time and era together: colonial and modern.

by Cate

On Hong Kong island be prepared for a hard workout. Hunting for cafes and bars, teahouses and antique shops, means working your way around and up through countless streets. Getting lost is part of the game plan. While these steeply terraced heights can overwhelm the flat lander, there are spots where temples reside, designed not only for quiet prayer but also for catching back that lost breath.

by Cate

Daylight and air can be sparse between the streets and buildings, giving a sense of claustrophobia. Head back towards the harbour and the terrain levels out changing that crowded feeling into one of relieved calm.

Here at the harbour, watching the ferries traffic passengers, and barges moving life on, Kowloon surprises you with new heights and splendor. Part of motherland’s investment and progress, and a strong desire to reach for those stars.

by Cate

Time will determine the shape of Kowloon’s cityscape and whether it will start to mirror its sister in Shanghai. Perhaps old Kowloon will be preserved or give way to even newer growth. For now it remains static, captured in time,  as a future memoir for an elderly traveller.

Caffinated Traveller